Communication Observations
Lately, I have been hearing lots of Bible lessons and devotionals on Biblical communication. As an autistic person I have always struggled with communication, so I decided to try and use these lessons to better understand what other people around me perceived communication to be and maybe I could learn how to communicate with other people better.
One of the things that I learned the most is that people consider communication to be basically words only, sometimes including tone of voice and other things like that, but basically just words. One speaker made a point tho that helped me realize something. He said that in this age when we have so much communication, with social media, etc., so much is being said and so many words are being used, but little is being actually communicated properly. This and other things made me think about the 5 different love languages. These love languages are more important than just for couples, because everyone uses these love languages in communication, whether they realize it or not. Only one of these love languages is all about words, the rest have to do with actions. The love languages are: words of affirmation, acts of service, giving gifts, quality/quantity time, and physical touch. If our words aren't paired with actions that match up with our words, then the words mean little to nothing to the people that we are trying to communicate with.
I heard a saying a long time ago that "People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care." This is a key thing that many people overlook in their communication. I have known people who said all of the right words and even used the right tone of voice, but their actions didn't back up their words. Their actions are a vital part of their character, and they didn't seem to understand that their actions spoke louder than their words.
There are many bad people who use all of the right words, but their heart and intentions are self-serving only, including people who are narcissistic. But, you don't have to be a narcissist to not be communicating the right way with everyone around you. I have had people in my life who, with their words, were nice to me, but their actions made me feel like I was unwanted in their lives. I have also had others whose actions backed up their words because they saw the significance of using more than one love language to communicate it to me, sometimes using all or almost all of the love languages to let me know that I am important to them and that they care about me.
Speak not only thru your words, but also in your actions. Let your actions back up and magnify your words.